Every week, we get together some of the brightest minds from different aspects of life for a discussion on relationships.
We pose five questions, none off limits, and post the answers here.
This Week We Have:
Samie, DJ & Writer
Stephy, Host, Dear John Romance Podcast
Ayona, Artist, Blogger, JustAyonaLee
Ace McCain or Cain, Rapper
Jay, The Everyday Man
What advice would you give your younger self about dating?
Samie: I wouldn’t change a thing. Made all the right decisions and choices that flowed with me. I gave myself time to think about the guys I talked to while I learned my power when it comes to dating at a early stage in life. That power allowed me to not be manipulated or taken advantage of by anyone.
Stephy: Take your time, ask questions, study behaviors, research social media accounts, & backgrounds before agreeing to dates & relationships. It’s okay to be alone.
Cain: Honestly, Young King don’t rush finding the right Queen until you’re ready. You’ll end up in situations and outcomes you could never possibly imagine. You start to get trapped in emotionally, physically and mentally draining, which hurts yourself & self-esteem. Relationships are like ships, gotta stay a float or it will sink eventually like the Titanic.
Ayona: I would tell my younger self:
First of all girl you’re young and you’re not going to find your soulmate/husband today. Just take the time to figure out what you don’t like and don’t let anybody mistreat you!
Elijah: I would say to take my time and go with the flow of things. Be ready and willing to learn and allow the experience to be.
Deosha: I would tell myself to never settle and choose wisely. Just because it’s familiar doesn’t mean it will do right by you.
Jay: Be careful with the people you deal with. Take your time, don’t rush and NEVER give second chances.
What makes you feel appreciated in a relationship?
Samie: The fact that a guy wants to spend his time with me. I love being adventurous and an invite to go do something simple is still so exciting to me. Or the fact that we can watch a movie or anime while having deep conversations about anything and everything.
Stephy: Acknowledgement of my efforts & improvements that I’ve made during the relationship. Accept & acknowledge my input or advice.
Ayona: I feel appreciated in a relationship if my S.O actually tells me that I am appreciated and showing that they think about me. i.e buying my favorite candy
Deosha: I would have to say going above & beyond to satisfy me. It doesn’t take much to make me happy.
Cain: What makes me feel appreciated is feeling appreciated and please don’t let that fly over your heads. In order for those you love or others around you in those situations to feel that energy and vibes, you have to make them feel that certain type of way or feeling. It’s almost like being in love with that certain somebody. I can’t explain it but it’s a feeling you get when you just know and you accept it. Makes me feel just like that. When it comes to Cain the small things matter, it’s never the big things because the smallest things mean everything to a King. It makes the picture that much bigger as well and that reassurance everybody needs especially if there are backgrounds of messed up relationships and more.
Cain: I would say being positive because that’s all that they ever are even when I’m downing my own self. She can keep me uplifted and I’ll always love her and hold her down for that. I’m already confident about mines and everybody future positivity.
Elijah: I feel that my significant other could be more considerate about decisions that affect both of us and that would make me feel more confident about the future.
Deosha: Gasssssssssss me up more than he does. Lol. My significant other doesn’t really know how to be romantic and express himself as he should so seeing him be more romantic and more vocal would make me more confident.
Stephy: Speak about the future more often using my name or references that point directly to me. Make plans or involve me in plans concerning the future.
If you had to change one thing about your relationship, what would it be?
Ayona: If I had to change one thing about my relationship, it would be the intensity. I would change it because I want things to be lighter instead of always being so emotional.
Deosha: To be honest I would eliminate all of the wrong doing. The wrong doing digs at my brain and somewhat causes brings out trust issues.
Samie: To be more harmonious & understanding.More open communications about what’s really going on within even if it seems hard
Stephy: I’m not currently in a relationship, but I would like for my next relationship to be more communicative. More discussion & dialect, less arguing and aggressiveness.
Elijah: If I had to change one thing about my relationship it would be the distance.
What does your significant other do that turns you on the most?
Elijah: I am turned on the most when my S/O gives me words of affirmation. I love being reassured about how she feels about me.
Stephy: In regards to my future significant other, I would say pay attention to me. Study me & learn me, my gestures & body language. Compliment me.
Cain: Everything she does honestly. Its almost like a natural high; nobody like the Queen. I can promise you that.
Ayona: When my S/O gives me advice!! Yeah advice for sure because i know that im not being led astray
Samie: I have two. When he teaches me something that makes me think, contemplate & question. Watching how excited he gets when he speaks about his passions and endeavors. His love for his work. I love watching a man chasing his goals and dreams down.